It wasn’t easy having a portal in her shower. She never knew who or what might emerge while she was under the spray, singing off key versions of show tunes.

Though there was one positive; she decided on some self-improvement. She gave her espresso machine to the Sally Ann, cleaned out her cupboards for the food bank, composted the contents of her veggie drawer, and started anew. A week detox of lemon water, watercress and oxygenated magnesium. Seaweed wraps and cupping. She emerged from her slug cocoon as a rainbowed butterfly.

A cup of herbal tea upon rising, then a kale and acai berry smoothie for breakfast. Lunch was the daily special at the Carrot Café. Steamed veggies with quinoa for supper. She meditated, practiced mindfulness, Tai Chi, and various sorts of yoga. Soon, she could form her lithe body into a pretzel – a snack, of course, she no longer ate.

So when the portal opened, and a teaser or a pleaser or a pleasurer arrived during her morning ablutions, her first impulse was no longer to reach for a towel.

image: hans via

A bit of silliness for Tale Waver #137, opening.