I don’t like my grandmother. Or crinolines, gloves, hats, and church on Sunday. I don’t like all the things she says like “Children may be seen, not heard.” or “Finish your supper – think of all the starving children in China.”
I don’t like being left there. Unless she makes me cake that is mostly icing – I don’t like cake – it feels funny when I eat it without double icing. Or a square egg for breakfast in the square pan.
But mostly, it’s: “Read; the closets upstairs are full of books you father and aunt and uncle read.” And full of ghosts – but she never believes me when I hear one. So I sleep upstairs with the closets of books and ghosts and the musty smell making me wheeze. I have allergies to things like hay and golden rod and I think dust.
But there is one thing that is special about being there – the big weeping willow at the top of the drive way that nobody drives up. It was too much up; it’s a hill. The willow branches grow all the way past the ground, and you can play inside. Have tea with dolls or fairys – mostly fairys. Fairys live in the gardens my grandmother is always busy at. That’s why the flowers grow tall like the gladeolahs and fox gloves that didn’t look like gloves at all. Especially not for foxes. There were no foxes to wear the gloves. Fairys make flower gardens grow.
People stop their cars on the road to admire her gardens, especially the roses and ask to see them. The fairys hide in the willow then. They are kind because they let people think my grandmother grew all the flowers and roses and she didn’t. I hate the smell of roses and it’s everywhere.
Inside the willow, I didn’t have to read the books, I could make up my own stories. Stories about everything. No crinolines allowed under the willow or in stories. I am sure fairys don’t wear crinolines or gloves. They might wear flower hats.
Stories for hours til someone finds me. Then I have to come out because it’s supper, or shopping in town, or because I’m not in the house reading. Oops, sorry I am not – you are supposed to speak proper in her house. No hate – it is do not like or love is do like and everything is pretty please. I am not pretty and I do not please – I listen at the top of the stairs when the ghosts let me.
For Tale Weaver #103, through a child’s eyes. I cried when she had the willow cut down.
(c) Lorraine
January 21, 2017 at 10:41 am
One word:
BITCH!
Sorry, that’s mean, but I have this mega mega thing about weeping willows …. I think we may have already discussed this at some point in all our travels …. so yeah, to cut it down, for no “good reason” ….. arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
But, if it’s any comfort, remember the magic and hold that in your heart.
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January 21, 2017 at 10:59 am
My grandmother was an evil bitch — there is a family gene, I swear, that I fight every day not to be like her and my uncle.
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January 21, 2017 at 11:09 am
((((((Lorraine))))))
I don’t think, that even at your absolute “worst” you are a bitch – and or “evil” ….. we all have our moments, and yes, we have the potential to be “dark and light” – one can’t exist without the other ….. but you are not either of them – her or uncle – and their “infection” and infectious memories, is the stranglehold power that shadows you – but don’t believe it for one minute …. not at all …… in fact, when you think or feel like you may be leaning “close” to that edge? pull an absolute zany child-bug-eyed thumb your nose phffftttt face and laugh … start laughing …. and see if that doesn’t cut the lingering b.s. crap by at least 1/2 force. It might just work well enough for you to start shaking this “hold” and weight off your shoulders.
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January 21, 2017 at 3:08 pm
I did forgive my uncle — what goes around comes around, and although I didn’t wish illness upon him, he has Parkinson’s — and ended up like my mother who he ripped off (read me too) that my mother would not let me pursue. Forgiving him was hard, but necessary. Hey the gene skipped my father, and he was a nose thumb-er.
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January 21, 2017 at 8:09 pm
sometimes it’s the apologies that never come that are the hardest ones to accept – no I didn’t think of that – caught in on FB awhile back – but maybe forgiveness is kind of the same thing.
Well, here’s an idea – maybe you are more of your father’s child than you have ever been led to believe …. so give it a go :)
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January 20, 2017 at 12:25 pm
I would get lost in a weeping elite at one time. Truly magical trees. 😀
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January 20, 2017 at 12:27 pm
Yes, there is a special magic under their protective and nurturing boughs. Saved me many a summer.
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January 20, 2017 at 12:34 pm
It was first tree I could climb. But it plugged up the sewer every spring. It was poisoned. 😓
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January 20, 2017 at 12:35 pm
I feel your sadness — this one was cut, so I had the raw stump as a forever reminder. Grandmother was not a nice woman.
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January 20, 2017 at 12:39 pm
I had very nice Grandmothers. My D father killed the tree. It was cut flush and 40 years layer my mom can’t grow a rose near the old stump
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January 20, 2017 at 1:48 pm
Still poisoned ground?
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January 20, 2017 at 2:04 pm
For roses and trees, it’s cursed ground. My father unloaded a full can of Copper Sulfate in the drain where the Willow stuck it’s in roots into. Apparently, the Willow absorbed a whole bunch of it. I makes no sense that it could still be there but nothing perennial grows there to this day
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January 20, 2017 at 1:50 pm
I might take some of own comment lines and play poetry. Let you know — thinking of going back a few days or so.
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January 20, 2017 at 2:08 pm
Use it as you will. Turning loose this kind of poetry on the world, may create a trend. We could become examples! Ooh, that sounds like a lot of work. 😉
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January 20, 2017 at 2:34 pm
I can not — just keep us unknowns without a trend to our name — your call.
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January 20, 2017 at 3:10 pm
post away darling. The innocence can’t be regained
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