It’s true. I never realized I was vain until my hair fell out and did not regrow itself this time. Vain were my attempts to cease being a Siberian husky in the Saharan Desert.

Now that 3/4s of my locks are gone, vain efforts are made to hide this ugly truth.

The final kick to my vanity – diagnosed with hereditary hair thinning and loss. Not a one of my relatives – even those in their 80s, and 90s, were buried with less than a full head of their own hair.

Confirms the vain hope I’ve held I was a changeling at birth and my crazy, dysfunctional family never really was mine. The divorce ceremony, a vain ritual of distance, was thus was unnecessary. The Cousin Itt ritual has yet to bear hair.

For Stephanie’s #tuesdayuseitinasentence: vain and Carly Simon – “You’re So Vain”